There are a lot of memorable things about Top Gun: the aviators, the old-school leather jackets and motorcycles, the Danger Zone song, the wet, slicked-back hair and baby-oiled male physiques… but arguably the coolest and most iconic are the call signs. Say “Maverick”, “Iceman” or “Goose” and almost anyone within earshot will suddenly start feeling the need for speed.
The release of Top Gun: Maverick 36 years after the original film means there are now approximately twice as many call signs in the franchise. We go through and rank them all, from worst to best. Minor spoilers for Top Gun: Maverick follow.
Charlie
This isn’t just a bad call sign, but a bad name. “Charlie” sounds like your annoying little nephew who’s really into trains. It’s an uninteresting call sign for a forgettable character. Top Gun: Maverick did well to ditch her.
Pay Back
“Pay Back” sounds like a bad 80s action movie starring Jean Claude Van Damme (edit: or apparently a 90s Mel Gibson action flick). At least make it “Payload” or something that’s more relevant. My suspicion is that it doesn’t quite roll off the tongue in the same way many of the others do because there’s a little grammatical confusion – it sounds like it could be a verb as well as a noun.
Rooster
What an absolutely terrible name, magnified by the fact that it’s for such an important character. It isn’t sexy or cool, but it also isn’t lame-but-funny the way that “Goose” is. He’s not even a redhead. It makes no sense. Apparently Teller chose this himself because it was evocative of Goose. This is why we let writers do the writing, Miles.
Cougar
Given your first thought when you heard the word “cougar”, this did not age super well.
Hangman
Hangman sounds kind of cool I suppose but it’s also a little bit of a mouthful. The reasoning behind this call sign is also a little weird: “becuase he leaves you out to hang” – really? Personally, I think they should have stuck with “bagman.”
Cyclone
“Cyclone” is undeniably a cool name, and Jon Hamm is one of the coolest guys to have ever walked the planet. But it doesn’t really fit because we never see him go off the rails, or do anything cool really other than shit on Maverick and make nonsensical tactical decisions that should get him fired as vice admiral.
Phoenix
Okay, this one is a little bit on the nose, but gets extra points because it actually has to do with flying, is the right amount of feminine (a big step forward in Maverick!) and (spoiler alert), she goes down but does survive.
Merlin
It’s easy to forget that Tim Robbins played Merlin, the capable wingman of Cougar who later fills in for Goose. He’s no Goose, but the badass nickname is worth of being Maverick’s RIO in the final fight with the MiGs. This would have been higher up if he had a long white beard, though.
Goose
Sometimes it makes sense to zag. Everyone else, especially in the first film, is trying so hard with these uber macho call signs, but this is the perfect call sign – it fits his personality, flies safely, and is immediately memorable. Great balls of fire – who among us doesn’t get a little bit emotional as soon as we think of Goose?
Viper
A top notch call sign for a top notch pilot and worthy of Tom Skerrit’s moustache. Viper plays the experienced instructor and father figure, but shows that he’s lost none of the snake-like reflexes and sharpness.
Hollywood
I don’t even really clearly remember who Hollywood is or looks like but what a fantastic nickname. Along with Maverick, it’s the only three syllable call sign but it rolls right off the tongue, and has such glamour, showyness, and pizzazz.
Maverick
The only call sign to appear in a Top Gun movie title and deservedly so. “Maverick” is just unique enough of a word that it really stands out, but also fits Pete Mitchell’s flying style and personality to a tee. It’s also such an apt name for Tom Cruise (the guy who after climbing buildings, flying helicopters, and jumping out of planes, now wants to shoot a movie in space). I would be his wingman anytime.
Iceman
There is literally no cooler name than Iceman. If you’re a real chum, you can even shorten it to “Ice.” One look at Val Kilmer and you know that this is a guy who doesn’t lose his cool under pressure, and can handle any situation with aplomb (although he might start chomping aggressively if he thinks you’re too dangerous).
Bob
Let’s give some recognition to the best character in the Top Gun franchise so far. You know what a real leader does? He’s someone that’ll keep his shirt on at the beach while everyone else is flexing their muscles slathered in baby oil. He doesn’t care what you think, he’s confident in his own intelligence and yet mysterious – we don’t know all that much about him. Does “Bob” stand for baby on board? Best of the best? Robert? Every possible variation somehow still works. Even Maverick recognizes his value and chooses him for the final mission. I can’t wait for Top Gun: Bob to come out.
I seldom open clickbate, and Ive never commented on an article, but when I seen the title of this article I was genuinely interested to see where the writer rated Bob, and only Bob. And by f…, they nailed it! The world full of adulation for the extroverted macho guys, rather than self driven, introverted achievers, whom don’t care for what people say or write (social media) about them. And I don’t think that is leaving western society in a good place. Deep seated depression for not achieving expected norms, suicide rate rocketing, self esteem issues, etc. If only the Bob’s were lauded more, then I doubt we’d be in the horrible situation we are in… (ex military officer)
You forgot one VERY important call sign… “Jester’s dead”! Michael Ironsides character, Rick “Jester” Heatherly. Was a big character at Top Gun.