Thanksgiving is about a lot of things: food, travel, holidays. But most of all, it’s about family gatherings and coming home. When you think about the well-known Thanksgiving movies, Bene Dion Rajagukguk’s newest film Missing Home (in Indonesian: Ngeri Ngeri Sedap) may not be one that immediately comes to mind, but it combines all the elements of the Thanksgiving tradition in a different cultural setting. As one of the characters in the movie likes to say, “Aren’t we all human in the end?”
Indonesian cinema has largely been known, if anything, for its genre films, particularly folklore based horror and some mind bendingly-good action flicks. But Missing Home is the complete opposite: a big-hearted family dramedy. As the premise goes, the children of the Domu family are all grown up, with the three sons living in different cities and only the daughter still living at home. Because the parents miss their sons and can’t convince them to return home from their busy lives for the traditional Batak Thanksgiving, they decide to pretend that they’re fighting and want to divorce, so that their children will return home and help try to mend the family.
This kind of reverse-Farewell plot sets itself up for some comedy hijinks. There are a ton of travelogue drone shots and the humor is at times a little bit cheesy and a little schlocky. But it’s also earnest and relatable, both from the perspective of the lonely empty-nester parents, as well as the independent-minded children who strive to break free from the constant nagging and dissatisfaction of their parents.
The parents hold fast to their traditional Batak values and ideas about things ranging from marrying non-Batak people, gender roles, and filial piety. There are also firm viewpoints on more universal things like saving face, holding stable and prestigious jobs, and obeying your parents. Each of the children would rather stay away physically from their parents than deal with the messiness of their family dynamics. There can be the tendency to build a new “home” – a place you actually feel comfortable and welcome and have autonomy instead of giong back to the place you grew up.
It’s hardly a spoiler to say that this ruse in the movie can only be kept up for so long, and that once it comes crashing down, so does everything else. Along the way, there are revelations and realizations by each member of the family. The second half of the movie can be sentimental and even a little saccharine, but it takes both vulnerability and bravery to change the things you can. Sometimes, a little extra syrup tastes good.
Now streaming on Netflix.
